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Jimmie Johnson's Car Put Out To Stud

theonion.com — Hendrick Motorsports confirmed what many NASCAR fans had suspected all season, announcing Wednesday that Jimmie Johnson's number 48 Chevrolet Impala would be put out to stud, ending its career in stock-car racing and living out the rest of its service life siring the cars of tomorrow.

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  • boombye, on 11/20/2008, -28/+12Nascar sucks.
    • djholybolt, on 11/20/2008, -6/+3It sucks huge donkey balls.

      I can't stand it.

      I'll go drive around in circles if i want REAL amusement.
  • cowboy86, on 11/20/2008, -17/+17Who's Jimmie Johnson and what's this "Nascar" you speak of?
    • john2kx, on 11/20/2008, -1/+7He's the former coach of the Miami Dolphins.. . I'm not sure about your 2nd question, sorry.
      • bleedingliberal, on 11/20/2008, -0/+1The Dolphins... They play with the pointy brown ball, right?
  • rossnyc, on 11/20/2008, -8/+14Ricky Bobby....I just like saying the name.
  • WiretapStudios, on 11/20/2008, -7/+10SHAKE AND BAKE
  • WoundedCow, on 11/20/2008, -12/+4Put the writer of this crap out of his misery. That was god-awful writing and not the least bit humorous. I think I died a little inside after wading my way through it, and I know I am now just a little stupider because I did so.
    • PolarBearCa, on 11/22/2008, -0/+1I don't think that is possible...
  • johnnynapalm, on 11/20/2008, -11/+11And WHAT'S the DEAL with NASCAR? Is it network storage? Is it transporation?
  • ybotoby, on 11/20/2008, -8/+6watching races makes me fall asleep
  • TheChunt, on 11/20/2008, -0/+13"The Chevrolet will also be forbidden from mating its power train with any non–General Motors product, as the historically conservative NASCAR organization has no wish to acknowledge the possibility of hybrids running in its racing series."

    Oh that is really good stuff right there.
  • trer, on 11/20/2008, -0/+6One of the funnier Onion pieces I've read ever. The headline alone had me laughing.
    • billbugger, on 11/20/2008, -1/+2I didn't realize it was an onion article until i clicked on the link.
  • moxysports, on 11/20/2008, -4/+3Mullet Hunting: THE only entertaining thing about NASCAR (http://www.fanmanual.com/nascar-101-how-to-mullet- ... . And yes, my family owns a goat named Joe Dirt and there is a moonshiner named Popcorn Sutton. I ***** you not, NASCAR is that boring to most rednecks.
  • pathouston22, on 11/20/2008, -9/+2We'll be going around in circles all night long
    We'll be going around in circles all night long
    We'll be going around in circles all night long

    YEEEE-HAWWW!
  • redfan, on 11/20/2008, -0/+11Even though I don't care a bit about NASCAR, that article was funny without taking potshots at the sport. Only The Onion could pull that off.
  • rickremixx, on 11/20/2008, -2/+4this is pretty funny i agree , lets hope they have a season next year with chevy and ford still in it
    • wsuvtx, on 11/20/2008, -3/+2There will be only Japanese cars from here on out. Detroit is washed up. Plus what a frickin waste of money.
  • billbugger, on 11/20/2008, -4/+1It's gonna do all of those Hondas in their tailpipes until they redline and blow a gasket!
  • tawnos, on 11/20/2008, -2/+2Can I buy it to daily drive?
    • alexwm20, on 11/20/2008, -0/+2only if you believe in Jesus and like Busch Lite
  • LanceUppercut, on 11/20/2008, -1/+3Is this the one where they turn right?
    • boombye, on 11/22/2008, -0/+1Yes which is challenging for our American cars, as they typically say on Top Gear, our cars are good for going fast in a straight line but not good at turning....NASCAR is like the ultimate durability and endurance test to make sure they can survive more than a few hours without breaking down.
  • partrow, on 11/21/2008, -1/+2Wow, what news. I am going to have to ponder the enormity of this for awhile.
  • stevenjchang, on 11/21/2008, -0/+2i dont understand the article because i dont know what STUD a Car means,

    anybody?
  •  

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